Not much to say....

Not much to say but work has been good this week so that is a good thing. Ray and I are getting ready to book our vacation to Cannon Beach again. We will be staying in the same place just will have Max with us this time! I'm so excited to get away if only for 3 days! It will have been a year when we go down there that I have done anything! Still trying to save up to go to Florida sometime. Once we get the truck paid off that will save a lot of money. I wish I just had $2000 laying around so we could do that. Will be so nice to have that extra $400 a month! Then my car should be paid off hopefully by the end of the year since I'll be able to pay my dad more once we pay the truck off. It will be great to get all that taken care of so we can really get out of debt and start saving for a house! That is about it for life right now, not much else to say. I'll try and post some pics from st patty's soon!

Is this normal? I want to be happy!

Is it normal to not like your job? I mean, I would love to love my job. I love the work I do but there are things about it that make me unhappy. Then when I tell someone they just tell me that everyone hates their job. I don't want to be one of those people. I want to be one of the few that can truly say they love their job. I don't know if I'm over-reacting on some stuff but I feel like I shouldn't be here. I feel like the work I do isn't appreciated. Honestly, to me, recognition is really important. If I don't get a 'thank you' or 'good job' I feel like I'm not doing well and that stresses me out. I just want to know that I'm doing what I'm supposed to be doing. And if I do something wrong I would like to be told in a way that will help me not make me feel worse. I don't want to just be told that I can't do part of my job until I talk to someone. I'd rather be told that someone would like to go over some more training with me because maybe I wasn't shown something correctly or I didn't understand something. There are a lot of things you learn as an employee that make you think of what you will and won't do if you're ever in management, I wonder if people ever really do follow through with what they shouldn't do when they get promoted. I feel like so many things are going wrong here and I don't like that feeling. We've been here for 4 months and they've already cut our commissions, I've been looked over for a promotion, our overtime got totally nixed, we are being constantly watched by the maintenance staff, I do way more than my title requires of me and don't get a thank you for any of it and our medical insurance stinks. I know that I am a hard worker and a dedicated worker but that never seems to matter when they look for someone new. I'm always the one that is looked over. I want to learn and I have a passion to learn but apparently that isn't good enough to be promoted. It really does bother me a lot that I got passed over. I've tried talking to my manager and that didn't help. Now they are just trying to hide the truth from me by giving her a 'different' title so they 'dont step on any toes' (those being my toes, thinking that I won't quit then) I love our apartment here and getting a discount on it helps a lot, along with discounted cable and free water/sewer and not driving but I just don't know if my happiness is worth it. I know the last few posts I have made have been all depressing and about work but I can't make things better. I thought they were for a day but then it just goes back again. So I'm really sorry for all the depressinness, I just can't sleep and need to type.

Wishing and hoping

So I realized that with all the friends I have found on myspace from years ago, there are only two others besides me that aren't married! I so so want to be married and I'm jealous of everyone that is. I went to another wedding last night and it was fun and she looked gorgeous but I so want it to be my time! When will my time come?

Work

So I feel like I'm stuck in this place in my life (work life) that won't allow me to move up because of my age. I feel like no matter what I try doing I will never be good enough or be trusted enough to move up and I don't understand that. I'm a good worker, I do everything that is asked of me and more. I'm always there, always there on time. I'm always willing to work overtime and work on my days off. I'm always wanting to learn and be given more to do. But for some reason that says that I'm not ready to be an assistant manager. I understand I haven't been in the industry for that long, ok. But I've proven myself to be a hard worker and I've proven that I want to be the assistant and I've proven that I will try my hardest to do the best job. But yet, they hire someone else who has been in the industry forever and who has manager experience. I like her a lot, she's nice and fun and easy to talk to. I just get run over in the mean time. I'm back at the front little desk at work and really, it is little. Hard to get work done without desk space. My days off are back to Wednesday and Thursday...supposedly until Kerry gets the hang of things and can be alone on Sundays so I can have Sun-Mon off. (which will be great if it really happens) I know a lot of the stuff has to do with Liz not liking me and that really bothers me as well. I know she's not around a lot but she still is the regional and she still gets to make the decisions. I really have an issue with people not liking me. The company also just told us we cant work any overtime, NONE at all. Not even maintenance who only has two guys and we're trying to start a rehab. Right. They also cut the amount we get for commission which means our pay is cut. It was also interesting to see that the budget calls for me to get a raise in march but yet nobody has said anything to me or to Tiffany. And of course, Tiffany doesn't have time to ask about it to let me know. I've been looking around at jobs again. I hate bouncing around like this but I'm not happy working here. I love living here, love our apartment. Just money is an issue. I could find a job that makes more so I can afford market rent on this apartment (we get 20% off) but that is only rent. We have discounted cable, free water/sewer/garbage and I walk to work so that saves a lot of gas and wear and tear on my car. It's also nice to be able to walk home to let Max out. But maybe corporate is the place for me. I just need to find something where I'm back to Mon-Fri, someplace that has good benefits, good pay and good vacation. I know most people hate their jobs but I don't want to be one of those people. I loved going to work at Piedmont but not here. Things are different and I never know what they are going to change when I go in. I almost feel like I'm back at WIT where I'm working for a small company that is trying to get bigger and they tend to overlook their employees and I don't like that. But then what if every company I go to turns out to be a bad choice as well. I can't afford to bounce around jobs. So yeah, basically work life sucks right now. Sorry I have been so depressing lately, but this is what is going through my head all day every day.